Nothing in this life can and has prepared
any of us for losing anyone…

Especially someone as special

a special existence?

Could a special existence
make more sense?

Even in the randomness?

I have experienced dualism
finding others like him
little bits of his laughter

busting out at my response
at the world as he evaporates
as I get frustrated and breaking
everything my little but always bigger
Brother…

When we were little
he would tease:
“You were adopted!”

“But we look alike…”

He knew it confused me
since I told him in secret:

“We are twins.”

“You know we’re not, right?”
He wanted to make sure I knew…

That out of our two years
days, minutes, seconds
which separated us
was a distance…

The deep down of living
with anyone who could
recognize you?
From a distance?
From a travelled
separation?

“Yeah, but we still are?”

I float around with this question
as he never answered…
Maybe got frustrated with it?
Maybe because he was protecting me…?

I can still hear his background
grinning, hahaing as I try to break
Everything!